Cheetahs Never Win_A Magical Romantic Comedy_With a Body Count by Rj Blain
Author:Rj Blain [Blain, Rj]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Fiction, fantasy, Humorous
Google: vzODDwAAQBAJ
Publisher: Pen & Page Publishing
Published: 2019-01-02T20:24:14+00:00
The first time Joe had poked through my memories, I hadnât noticed him doing it. I assumed the transfusion and my weakened state had numbed me to his work. With time running short, he abandoned his finesse and stirred through my head with a red-hot poker. It hurt too much to scream, and my life flashed in front of my eyes, a confusing blur of images, sounds, and sensations.
He stopped and slowed every time Iâd thought about his sister, and the instant I felt up for the task, Iâd beat him black and blue over it.
When he got to the crash, I lost a few minutes of my life as the pain associated with the memory intensified beyond my ability to handle it.
I woke up to Joe slapping my cheeks.
âI really hadnât wanted to do that, but itâs the only way I can access your memories. I have to rewind them,â he confessed. âOnce you went down, I got what we needed. Iâm sorry. If I could have prevented it, I would have.â
âThat sucked. Can we not do that again?â
âThatâs the idea. I rewound as far back as your first contact with Tom Heatherow.â
That would likely bite me in the ass later. âSo, youâre saying you own my ass for the foreseeable future.â
âSomething like that. Youâre pathetic. I just thought you should know that. You really went through all that work to avoid her traps, cleaned up after her, and waited until she came over to dunk yourself so she could lick the skin off your face.â
âBasically, yes.â
âYou were infected before the crash.â
I blinked. âPardon?â
âYou were infected before the crash. Thatâs Dad behavior. Thatâs ridiculously similar to Dadâs behavior. Thatâs breeding male cheetah behavior. When were you last tested?â
âNot that long ago.â
Joeâs eyes narrowed. âNo. Thatâs definitely infected long-term behavior. Thatâs not âstandard human hates women Aaronâ behavior.â
âIt was one of my more desperate stunts,â I agreed.
âHow long have you been buying my sister shoes?â
âYears,â I admitted.
âIâd probably kill you rooting through your memory for years, so I canât look to see how the hell you contracted lycanthropy.â
âYou seem a little sure I contracted lycanthropy.â
âAaron, my sisterâs tongue is worse than sandpaper. She can flay muscle from bone with that tongue. Thatâs what itâs there for. You should have been bleeding after she licked you for two hours. It hurt, but that was not the reaction of a standard human being licked. The virus was already there and healing your face. You barely had a mark on you after that. Slightly reddened cheeks. Thatâs a sure-fire sign of lycanthropy to me. But how the hell did you avoid detection? Youâre checked how often?â
âEvery two years when Iâm renewing my license.â
âAnd youâve been partnered with Sassy since you started college. Can you think of any time you might have mixed blood with Sassy?â
âNot that Iâm aware of. Sheâs really careful about transmitting the virus. Iâm not allowed to go anywhere near her if she thinks I might contract the virus.â I shrugged.
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